Remember in Sex and the City when Carrie starts dating Aidan and doesn't understand why he doesn't want to sleep with her after a few dates? You probs don't because I'm the only one who's still obsessed with the show. Anyway, Carrie realizes that Aidan doesn't want to have sex with her right away because he's a romantic, and wants to wait for everything to be just right. But do these hopeless romantic men still exist outside of fictional TV shows?
It's hard to pinpoint when exactly romance died, and who killed it. My theory is that the biggest tech companies came together one day and planned an elaborate murder plot to kill everything charming. That's why no one comes to the door to pick up their date anymore, and instead everyone opts for a cold 'I'm here' text.
Also, no one (aside from my FOB group of friends) calls people on the phone. Everyone always chooses to text, and that's kind of depressing. I remember in an episode of Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger tells one of her clients to "pick up the fucking phone" if he wants a successful relationship. Her theory was that women fall in love with their ears, and not by reading texts. Sadly, I feel like very few people follow Patti's advice, and instead stay up into the early hours of the morning, texting.
Okay, so I've presented you with some evidence regarding the death of romance. But, I've yet to talk about sex. A friend of mine (Not me, I promise!) recently started seeing this guy, and after 3 dates he wanted to do the Deed. For most of the dates, he's taken her to random parks, where they talk for a bit and then make out for the rest of the time. She isn't ready to have The Sexuals, but he doesn't quite understand why she insists on waiting. We manage to remain friends with people for years without having sex, so why does sex become the number one priority when looking for a life mate?
We're living in a time where hookups trump real relationships, and people are having sex long before they're into their monogamous relationships. Romance may seem dead in many of these situations, but there is still hope with some cardiac resuscitation.
Ruty told me that whenever she's feeling sad about the state of romance in the world, she goes onto YouTube and watches random people's wedding and engagement videos. All of those grand gestures and performances that people do for their lovers instills her with a feeling of hope, that romance is still very much alive in the lives of those who choose to keep it.
It all really boils down to one thing - how you let the other person treat you. If you show your intended that going to parks and making out is not what you're into, and that you're more of a dinner and movie kinda gal, then the person will either treat you the way you want to be treated, or they'll dip (either way - you win, because you don't need an extra hater in your life).